Friday, February 27, 2015
Have you ever felt like you were in a thick, mind-numbing fog? Like you were stuck in a dark hallway... a hallway so dark that it totally blinded you, rendering you helplessly immobile and unable to see your way out? Those already familiar know that I've been searching for a home/apartment as well as trying to get some other things lined up. I've been kinda feelin' my way through it all while beseeching God for clarity and an open pathway to my desired destination. And after what has felt like an eternity of endless wandering (and wondering), I am finally starting to feel the warmth of the light at the end of the tunnel on my face.
It sort of came on me, or fell on me, like a ton of bricks. It was an epiphany that was a slow and steady bloom at first, but quickly caught momentum as it enveloped my entire body in a weighty, passion-soaked ambition that I haven't experienced in a very long time. And ever since it has taken root and lodged inside my belly, I haven't been able to keep still. I've intimated as much on Twitter; I've been so distracted this entire week, my mind's been racing with all these new ideas and things I want to do - that I NEED to do - that I haven't been able to focus on too much else. It's like God was waiting on the perfect time for me to receive His perfect counsel and now everything is flooding in on me all at once. And I'm so excited!
Now, it's going to take me a little bit to fully plan this out and a few months still to see the first part come to fruition. But I'm completely ready to put in the work! The dense fog I've been trapped in for many moons is dissipating. And the tunnel? There still is a tunnel. But there's that light at the end of it, too. I can see it. I really can. I can see the pathway - my own tailored pathway - and have begun a persistent amble towards its door. My vision for my life and how I want to live it has finally been restored to a perfect 20/20, y'all. And that fluttering in my gut? That just means I'm nervous... and happy... and pregnant with a whole new set of possibilities to give birth to.
I am finally starting to feel the warmth from the light at the end of the tunnel on my face.